Soccer Supremo - A Sports Progression Fantasy

7.

It was gloomy, overcast skies, and a light drizzle as Briggy drove me to the Allianz Arena. She leaned forward and looked up. ”You brought the English weather with you.”

”Congratulations on being the thousandth person to say that today. You win a prize, which is to punch yourself in the face.”

She glanced at me even though I had ordered her to keep her eyes on the road at all times. ”Are you feeling the strain? Do you want to take a break in a sensory room?”

Bayern had several rooms in their stadium designed to help people with special needs calm down. The idea was that fans of all kinds should be able to enjoy a match day experience and if they got overstimulated, there was a place they could chillax for a minute surrounded by lights and noises they could control, and - my favourite - the softest bean bags known to man. It was very inclusive, very cool, and we would do something very much like it in the Deva. ”Are you making fun of sensory rooms?” I said, ready to vent.

”I’m making fun of you.”

”Neurodivergent people catching strays,” I said. ”Top finesse. Great.”

She drove on, in what I thought was a foul mood. I was wrong. ”I apologise.”

”What? What for?”

”I wanted to punch up but I punched down. I punched up and down at the same time, which, by the way, is something I can actually do.”

”Can you keep your hands on the wheel when you’re driving? That’s something I’d pay to see.”

She made a noise that I chose to interpret as enthusiastic agreement.

We moved past a long row of apartment blocks and suddenly, there it was. The Allianz Arena itself. 75,000 capacity, enormous, intimidating. The overall appearance was that of a futuristic tyre laid on its side, modern and curving and beautiful. The facade was made of plastic air pockets, sort of like bubble wrap, and each pocket could be lit in a different colour.

Tonight it was all red.

”It looks like something from Mass Effect,” I said.

”What’s that?”

”It’s a video game set in the far future. All the buildings are massive, curved, brightly lit.”

”I lurve hearing boys talk about video games,” said Briggy. ”All I know is they used to have the colours change but there were crashes for miles because drivers got distracted. Great idea, right? Having the world’s biggest stop sign flash on and off in view of some of Europe’s busiest roads. The police put a halt to it.”

”I’ve been before,” I said, as the thing got bigger and bigger. ”I was an analyst. It was my job to stand at the side and bitch about what the managers were doing.”

”Now you’re on the receiving end.”

”Yeah.” I licked my lips. ”It’ll be fine. Nothing can go wrong.” My stomach did a forward roll. ”Maybe I will pop into the sensory room. I hear the bean bags are world class.”

***

We parked in Bastian’s spot, walked to the entrance, and I took a look at the stadium from below. It was very much like an airport car park with huge columns and concrete as far as the eye could see. Unimaginable amounts of concrete had been poured to build this thing. Maybe that’s what you had to do to get a 75,000 mega-stadium but I did wonder about the environmental impact. My new Deva stadium would be built from wood.

”The Deva’s atmosphere comes from the fans,” I said. ”If they’re up for it, they generate a sort of force.” I put my hand on a concrete pillar and looked around, taking it all in. ”This is so massive it comes with an instant aura. You’re on the Bayern bus, you come here, it’s vibrating with power, right? We did this, we built this. You’re on the away bus and my God, it’s so imposing. The buses have to go a long way around, slowly, until they get to here. I’m not sure if it’s an accident or by design but the away players are dragged around the stadium. They really get their noses rubbed in it, you know? We’re big, you’re small. We’re the rekordmeister, you’re not.” Rekordmeister meant ’record champions’, a term used to describe the club which had most often won a country’s top division. I had only been in Munich for a few days but had heard it, with no exaggeration, 75,000 times. ”Everything here is designed to show that you’ve come to the lion’s den. If you play for one of the smaller teams you’re half-beaten already.”